Elvis Death Day 2005
Ahhh, Elvis. Your life was not your own.
Annual Re-post - Originally posted 8/16/2003Driven to an early demise by the greed of others, your sweet soul and imperturbable charm will be your greatest legacy. Well, that and the fact that your colon weighed 62 lbs and was chalky and impacted at the time of your sweet release. And the fact that you thought you could control the weather.
Oh, Elvis, was it your destiny to be great and burn out young? Why was it that cruel, cruel fate never let you live up to your own impeccable standards? We can all remember the day you inspired us all with your TCB mantra - Taking Care of Business your way. I can recite it by heart.
The TCB Oath - by Elvis Aaron Presley
- More self-respect.
- More respect for fellow man.
- Respect for fellow students and instructors.
- Respect for all styles and techniques.
- Body conditioning.
- Mental conditioning.
- Meditation for calming, and stilling of the mind and body.
- Sharpen your skills.
- Increase mental awareness.
- For all those who might choose: a new outlook and personal philosophy.
- Freedom from constipation.
- T C B Technique.
- All techniques into one.
- Elvis Presley 8th
- Applying all techniques into one.
So today we celebrate your fiery end - the end of a life less ordinary, to be certain. We are but humans, and we need things to hold on to - things we loved so much about you.
Thanks for the good times.
12 Missives So Far
01 Shawn said on Wed Aug 17 0:50:25 EDT
'Tis sad, sad indeed. I grew up listening to Elvis. My father actually idolized him to a point of ridiculous behavior. I guess we all are susceptible to such behavior, but my father went to extremes. He would drive 50 miles one way to purchase a particular brand of hair-spray called "Sudden Beauty." I laugh thinking about it. He did have the same hair-do though. So, I know a lot of Elvis tunes, interestingly enough.
02 josh said on Wed Aug 17 1:04:07 EDT
Yes, Elvis is a hero of mine, in a bizarre, mocking, schadenfreude sort of way. I know my fair share of ridiculous Elvis fans, most of whom reside upon the continent of Europe.
What's really funny what dribs and drabs of Americana outlanders tend to pick up. I attended an American high school with a majority of students that were decidedly not American, and in retrospect, it is quite amusing how fads over here played out over there. Nothing quite so funny as a Saudi teenager singing Guns n Roses. With the bandana, of course.
03 Mark said on Sat Aug 20 16:21:04 EDT
If Elvis is indeed dead then who is that big, fat guy working at the Krispy Kreme's down the street from me. Sure looks like King to me.
04 josh said on Sat Aug 20 16:35:16 EDT
Ahh, but you see, there was only one true King. The people you see in bus stations and doughnut shops are the Spawn of Elvis, created in much the same way as Steven Spielberg's Gremlins™.
But instead of water, of course, the required element for this spontaneous procreation is the unlikely combination of narcotic cough syrup and hair tonic.
06 vanessa said on Mon Aug 22 16:33:33 EDT
yeah there ain't no wooly boogers on you! lol
08 vanessa said on Wed Aug 24 0:25:13 EDT
heh... did you really think I would forget?
09 josh said on Wed Aug 24 2:07:28 EDT
Well, frankly—when it comes to my sense of humor and its appeal to other people, I always tend to work from a baseline of insufferable; That way any positive reaction makes me feel like the funniest guy on earth.
Badumpbump-tisss! ;)
11 josh said on Thu Aug 25 7:25:29 EDT
Sorry, bubs. All my time is going into WBA thesedays. I'll think of somethin'. In the mean time, check out the punitive GIF I've created for the hotlinking beanbags of the world:
http://www.hinkybox.com/images/avasthotlinkers.gif
Cute, yeah? :P
12 Halden said on Fri Sep 2 11:43:55 EDT
Elvis Death Day is also m wedding anniversary, we were haunted by Elvis memorabilia throughout our honeymoon.
Comments are currently off for this entry.